5 Halloween Horror Nights Houses I Never Want To See

[Content Warning: Isolation, human centipede, fecal matter, vagina dentata, children, diarrhea, food poisoning, mold, food] 1. The Happening I’m pretty salty about this movie, even years later, because I was really excited for it when it came out. My theory is this: Shyamalan bet his friends he could kill it with a trailer but make […]

I Will Soon Be Unemployed

AUTHOR’S NOTE: I wrote this in 2006 for a college course. [Content Warning: Work related stress, violence, ageism] Let me be honest with you, this paper is pretty much nothing more than a rant about how much I hate my job, and why.  By the end of the day this will be on my Live Journal, […]

The Definition Of Customer Service

AUTHOR’S NOTE: I wrote this in 2006 for a college course. [Content Warning: Work related stress, ableist slurs, ableism (sorry, I was young and naive), ageism,] My job is psychological guerrilla warfare.  That is right; I work as a Customer Service Coordinator at a discount retail store.  Customer service is not assistance and other resources that a […]

Pirates VS. Lumberjacks

AUTHOR’S NOTE: I wrote this in 2006 for a college course. [Content Warning: Satire, stereotypes, sexism, violence, alcohol, cancer] There is a point in time in every boy’s life where he becomes a man.  This could be at the age of thirteen, or at the age of thirty.  Either way, this boy must choose how manly they […]